Friday, October 17, 2014


Facebook intellectuals
If you live in West Africa, Ebola is a real and terrifying threat. If you live in the United States, you're more likely to get struck by lightning, eaten by a shark or nail Jennifer Lawrence than catch the dreaded virus. Stop freaking out, stop propelling the heinous culture of fear and ignorance that is destroying our society, but most importantly...stop spamming my social media feeds with your asinine bullshit. The sanctity of our Facebook walls is meant for important things [like links to my blog].

Here is some helpful reading material for you Homer Simpson types, ready to barricade yourselves indoors due to your irrational fear of some Ebola toting boogeyman (or boogeymen).

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Ebola is spread through bodily fluids. It's most contagious when victims show signs of infection aka; are projectile vomiting and shooting explosive diarrhea. Fetishes aside, if you refrain from drinking piss or maybe hold off on your regularly scheduled satanic blood sacrifice for the next month or should be just fine.

Africa is scary. They have lions and pirates and AIDS [oh my] and they even tried to kill Tom Hanks! Now they've got the Ebola and they're gonna spread their apocalyptic cooties to the Heartland via airplanes. Quarantine the continent! Block all travel to and from and just close your eyes really hard until the danger passes. Sounds great...until you discover that would only make things WORSE.

Finally, you Conspiracy Nuts:
Governments do a lot of shady things [hai Iraq!], but unleashing biological nightmares like Ebola is probably not one of them. It goes back to the MAD doctrine. The idea of Mutually Assured Destruction is why no one actually uses nuclear weapons, because you fuck around with those things and everyone loses. Imperialistic wars w/ American canon fodder = good for business. Biological pandemic that kills humanity = bad.

Ebola is a serious and horrifying thing going on in Africa. This outbreak has more to do with the lack of healthcare infrastructure and education levels [washing the contaminated corpses cuz 'muh social/religious traditions'] in these Third World countries than the virus itself. More people will die from the flu in the USA then Ebola. Chill out. Educate yourselves and stop spamming my feeds!

I'll leave you with some words of wisdom from Fox News of all places. Fox "WAR ON EVERYTHING" News. Think about that one.

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