Crunch Time: Celtic Frost

I think I failed to explain in my previous Crunch Time post that this would be an ongoing thing here on my Jim's Fear bloggy blog. No, I totally failed to mention it. Instead of announcing the purpose of the Crunch Time segment, to highlight the awesomeness of my favorite HEAVY metal riffs, I wrote a drawn out "The Black Dahlia Murder is super rad" editorial which is causing me to explain myself here. Oh wells.

Are you Morbid?

So here is Celtic Frost, one of the most important yet criminally underrated metal bands of all time. They may look retarded but seriously, without Celtic Frost, metal's evolution would have been stunted in it's infancy. No Celtic Frost = No Black Metal, No Grindcore, No world I want to live in. The fellow with the luscious blond locks is Thomas Gabriel Fischer aka Tom G. Warrior. Previously of Hellhammer, currently of Triptykon, he will go down in history as the man behind Celtic Frost and creator of this FAT FUCKING RIFF right here (begins at the 8 second mark):



Holy feces, did ya feel that? Huh? I did. Still do after all these years. Tom's opening little Howard Dean scream rules so hard ("Yeeeeeeeeow!") Just about every Napalm Death songs in the past decade has an obligatory "Celtic Frost" part that sounds exactly like this song. So enjoy the epicness of Celtic Frost.